The train has seriously been derailed lately. Last night hubby said the cruelest thing ever. He called my womb old and withered. It was so vicious. I just started to cry. He put the final nail in the coffin for me. I thought maybe I was depressed before, but now I know I am. I have no energy, no desire to do anything anymore. I just want to sleep. I can barely get moving.
Today my goal is to hit the gym. I have a lot on my plate, but I think I can make it happen. I just need some motivation.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Under enthused...
Yup that's about what I've got here. I was supposed to go to New London last night and just didn't feel like it. Wasn't up for dealing with a diva. I'll call him today. I just want to go play. I'm not sure why. I am frustrated by my diet to no end and ready to throw in the towel. I feel like I've had very little success. I also feel like a quitter when it comes to the gym. I've been sleeping 10 hours a night, plus an hour nap for the past few days. I can't seem to get out of my own way. So tired of being fat and feeling ugly because of it.
I need help with the drinking but hubby would never understand. I sneaked a beer and some cherries at lunch yesterday and then went to the bar and had two beers instead of going to that appointment. I feel terrible about it.
Ok, enough of that. Let's find the positives. My sauce came out awesome. Pretty sure hubby ruined the first batch by putting way too much baking soda in it. Of course try and tell him that. I got a proposal out yesterday. Hopefully I can get two more out today. One more thing on the upside....the might actually be money in the bank and the bills getting paid.
I need help with the drinking but hubby would never understand. I sneaked a beer and some cherries at lunch yesterday and then went to the bar and had two beers instead of going to that appointment. I feel terrible about it.
Ok, enough of that. Let's find the positives. My sauce came out awesome. Pretty sure hubby ruined the first batch by putting way too much baking soda in it. Of course try and tell him that. I got a proposal out yesterday. Hopefully I can get two more out today. One more thing on the upside....the might actually be money in the bank and the bills getting paid.
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
Ho hum
Blah. What a bummer. Measured my waist line this morning and it's up to 41". I want to cry because yesterday was a pretty good day. Two cheats. Ice cream and a frozen burrito. Drank the lemon water, got a vinegar tonic in. Homemade eggplant parm for lunch. Breakfast was a handful of almonds.
Went to the grocery store. Very expensive, but worth it I hope. Thought it was pretty funny that the store was out of organic eggs except the 6 pack type. One woman walked by and said, "Oh, look. They're out of eggs." Well I thought to myself, "Well, at least the good kind".
No exercise yesterday. Still tired from Maine. Slept in until 6:30. Have an appointment at 10:30. Do not want to rush through my day. Kitchen's a mess. Looks like I get to hit Pork Chop Hill tomorrow. Yuck!
God I could use a good swift kick in the ass to buckle down and get some work done. I'm tired of working all the time. I'm tired of the office work. I just want to go punch a clock somewhere and be done with it.
Went to the grocery store. Very expensive, but worth it I hope. Thought it was pretty funny that the store was out of organic eggs except the 6 pack type. One woman walked by and said, "Oh, look. They're out of eggs." Well I thought to myself, "Well, at least the good kind".
No exercise yesterday. Still tired from Maine. Slept in until 6:30. Have an appointment at 10:30. Do not want to rush through my day. Kitchen's a mess. Looks like I get to hit Pork Chop Hill tomorrow. Yuck!
God I could use a good swift kick in the ass to buckle down and get some work done. I'm tired of working all the time. I'm tired of the office work. I just want to go punch a clock somewhere and be done with it.
Monday, September 1, 2014
After the trip....
WOW! That's about what sums it up for me. 2 days of not drinking lemon water in the morning, and eating whatever was available resulted in an inch and a half increase in my waist line. We can follow up that wow with a yikes.
So back home and back on track. Lemon water check. Up next is the whole vinegar tonic mix. I can do this. I must do this. I need to do the menu planning piece today and grocery shop. The house is a mess and needs some TLC. I can't believe it's nearly 9 AM and hubby is sleeping away and I have next to nothing done. I don't want to work today, but have clients with needs.
Goals for today are to
1) Menu plan and grocery shop
2) tomato sauce
3) garden goodies....
4) estimates
5) clean house!
Wish me luck! That's a lot to get done.
So back home and back on track. Lemon water check. Up next is the whole vinegar tonic mix. I can do this. I must do this. I need to do the menu planning piece today and grocery shop. The house is a mess and needs some TLC. I can't believe it's nearly 9 AM and hubby is sleeping away and I have next to nothing done. I don't want to work today, but have clients with needs.
Goals for today are to
1) Menu plan and grocery shop
2) tomato sauce
3) garden goodies....
4) estimates
5) clean house!
Wish me luck! That's a lot to get done.
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